• Encourage, but do not pressure others to talk about what happened and their reaction to the incident.  When they want to talk- listen.  Don't give advice, just listen and be present. 
  • Ask them what you can do to be helpful
  • Offer support, safety, and compassionate care even though you may not understand what they are going through.
  • Offer to help them with everyday tasks such as cleaning, cooking and caring for children and other family members
  • Give them space AND encourage them not to isolate from others.
  • Don't take their anger or other feelings personally.
  • Remember that "getting back to normal" takes time.  Grief and loss has no time line. 
  • Be aware that recovery is not a straight path but can be a matter of two steps forward and one back. You will make progress.
  • Say things like "I'm sorry this happened", "I'm sorry for your loss" or "How can I help".  Do not say things like "It was God's will", "You are lucky, it could have been worse", "everything happens for a reason" or "just keep your mind busy with something else".
  • Discourage use/overuse of drugs/alcohol if possible.
  • Encourage self-care which includes plenty of rest and normal exercise and eating well-balanced, regular meals.

Sources- adapted from and